Thursday 29 May 2014

How to stay sane whilst moving countries....

 “I learned this, at least, by my experiment: that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavours to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.” Henry Thoreau

"How can you be so calm?!" was a frequent question directed at me as I sat nonchalant on the sofa. Ever since becoming a mother and realising that you just cannot be the obsessively, tidy, neat, organised person you once were, I have developed a rather good c'est la vie attitude. There was nothing he or I could really do. I had thrown out or given away most of our belongings, sorted out cupboards and now all we could do was to wait for the movers to come and pack.

Or so I thought...

The day came heralded with a toddler who wasn't feeling her best (we found out a couple of days later that she had quite a bad case of tonsillitis). Three men came in and spent all day packing up the house and then taking the boxes away. It was a complete shambles - but more on that later.

I found it was quite hard trying to find out exactly what Edmonton had to offer and whether it would be a nice place to raise a family. There were so many questions buzzing around my brain. First and foremost was of course the bitter cold. I had never experienced anything below -10 degrees C and on those days we stayed in doors with the fire cranked up. As it turned out, -40 was cold, but once you were bundled up it wasn't so bad.

I can remember when I was 20 and fresh out of college wondering what to do, so many dreams, such a lot of time to do them in. I got a fortuitous job as a nanny in Notting Hill. I was living with my parents at the time (as one does) in their beautiful house in Trinidad, but thought nothing of moving to another country. I had been to England before, I had travelled through London - how bad could it be? I moved with 2 suitcases and left my little dog in the safe care of my parents. Tickets in hand, I left for this new adventure. Well... long story short, I spent the Summer in a very imposing, but beautiful Manor house belonging to my new boss's sister and her husband (he was an Earl I later found out!). For someone who loved (and still does) period dramas, social history and high society this was heaven... Anyway, I digress... my point being, I had moved countries before and after 13 years I had come to call good ol'Blighty home. We were old friends, we had shared a lot, had some secrets, cried and laughed together and furthermore our home was comfortable. We had good friends. Our Munchkin had good friends - one of whom she shared a special bond, the likes I had never seen in children so young. Why would I want to start all over again? The answer: I think you will probably have guessed - happiness and greater opportunity. Isn't that why most people emigrate?

The bonus being we got to explore the city and have a good look around before we made the final commitment! Something that I never had the luxury of doing before. And so I would like to impart some of our experiences to anyone who is thinking of doing the same thing. As it would have been helpful knowing what I know now.

1. First of all - say YES to opportunities (good ones of course)! Because you can be stuck in rut, wrapped up in warm comforting blankets, with everything that is familiar around you... and a grumpy husband with itchy feet complaining about the inadequacies of Quantity Surveyors and Upper Management. If you just say "Yes" all sorts of experiences start to unfold at your feet that you never would have believed possible! Case in point - if I had said "No" to that lovely Texan lady when she asked me to be her nanny then I would probably never have lived in a Manor house, never moved to London and never had an amazing adventure with the rich and famous! If I had said "No" to going back to college to study art, I would probably never have got a job in a construction company as a layout designer, never have met my husband and had our lovely Munchkin. Of course it is all a calculated risk, but that's what life is all about right? 

2. Moving in any way, whether it is next door, to another county or internationally, is in itself a logistical nightmare. So anyway that you can make it easy on you and your family is a definite bonus! I'm glad we decided not to ship all our furniture since our new house could not have fitted it. However we did ship our bed and sofa, which we could have done without. Comfy as they maybe.

Shipping, as we found is not cheap, and we thought it would be better for the company to pack our items. They are professionals. They should be able to pack better than us, right? Well... Not exactly. I think in some cases I would have done a better job. For instance, the vast majority of our electronics
(the ones that would work with the change of voltage) got water damage and had to be replaced because the box did not indicate such items were inside. Other personal items were badly packaged and got damaged beyond repair and are (as we found out) irreplaceable. Some got sent that we had no intention of sending, which all add up when you are paying for the square footage. So look into the finer details of the shipping company you wish to use, you might be glad you did.

Make sure you have lots of big suitcases: we had six in the end. When packing suitcases, make sure you pack a couple pots and pans, a few utensils and maybe some cutlery and crockery. Although paper plates and plastic forks can work wonders! As it turned out we didn't have any of these things and if it hadn't been for a kindly friend leading us a pot and pan, I'm not sure what we would have done. Especially as our shipment took four months to arrive!

3. Accept it will take a while to get settled, moving is expensive, and there are hidden costs around every corner. This is a fact I have to keep reminding myself - it is hard when you are used to a certain type of life style. And I'm a creature of comfort!

4. Research is key - anyone who knows me, knows I do a lot of research. If you can afford it, an exploratory visit is well worth the money. Set up house or apartment viewings when you arrive, as most agents don't respond to emails from foreign addresses. Explore each neighbourhood as well as you can, we looked for schools, playgroups, parks, shops and entertainment. Go to a grocery store and compare the prices of food and what is on offer. And because we met with the agents we were able to get the ball rolling for the townhouse of our choice. It felt much better knowing we had a definite place to live in and that we knew the neighbourhood was good too.

5. And finally, a favourite Aunt with a house full of teenage cousins is more valuable than you could ever imagine! Being able to package (in some cases) a not very well Munchkin off to her Aunt's house knowing she would get the best care and entertainment possible, was the best help we could get. In fact, I'm surprised she even wanted to come home after all the fun she had!

It was a roller coaster of emotions, but now that the dust is settling we can happily say we are excited about the future. So far it definitely seems to be a risk worth taking.






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2 comments:

  1. Nan Sheppard30 May 2014 at 01:50

    We miss you! And we'll babysit any time :) Love you guys! XX

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  2. Caffeinated Baker30 May 2014 at 06:06

    Research , research, research! Amazed at the shipping but working in a shipping company before you are definitely right about the cost per sq inch. I hope you three settle in well and hopefully when I do the same here in New England we will be able to share and analyze each others notes on migrating to cold countries . :) *hugs*

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